Legos critique The Lego Movie

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Several Legos (pictured above) have come together to critique The Lego Movie, which if you aren’t seven years old or an adult nerd and have already seen it, is a movie about an ordinary Lego construction worker who is recruited to join a quest to stop an evil tyrant from gluing the Lego universe into eternal stasis.

After viewing the film, the Legos disclosed that they were highly disappointed with how the movie portrays the typical life of a Lego, which is far from exciting.

IMG_0583The majority of Legos are forced to live in torn up cardboard boxes located in basements across America, which many Legos consider to be an inhumane practice. Legos are generally free and able to interact with their peers after being purchased; however, they are then thrown in these cage-like boxes, which they typically remain in until death.

Many Legos have also recounted several horror stories in which they have been molested by cockroaches and forced to play with other toys such as Serena the Magical Unicorn and Barbie. As most would expect, they stated that “Barbie is a total bitch.” The Legos also reported that they are racially profiled on a daily basis. As pictured below, Legos are commonly separated by skin type, and are severely punished if any Lego interacts with a Lego of a different color.

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Lastly, the Legos who viewed the film would like to acknowledge their late friend Benny (pictured on left). Benny was mutilated by the families chihuahua and severely mishandled by the families 6-month-old infant (it is suspected that the infant used Benny as a teething device).

 

 

 

Image 1 attribution:
Flickr LEGO Movie Theater” by 713 Avenue.

Image 2 attribution:
Noushprojects

Image 3 attribution:
Lego Storage Wars: Simple Solutions for LEGO storage” by Jennifer Murray.

“Image 4 attribution:
toys2remember.com” 

 



Categories: Articles

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3 replies

  1. Legos do get a chance to exact some revenge, however, when they are left on a child’s bedroom floor for a parent to step on barefooted in the middle of the night.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sounds like someone has stepped on a few legos in their lifetime…(insert emojicon about foot hurting due to stepping on legos)

      Like

      • Yes, as a child, because my brother had a ton of legos, and now as an adult, and a mother of four boys. If I had to wish anything upon someone I despised, it would be that they would step barefoot on legos every night for eternity.

        Like

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