ABC’s The Bachelor/Bachelorette: Make it your own

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ABC’s shows The Bachelor and Bachelorette are among the most watched reality television shows. Since its season debut in 2002, Chris Harrison has been helping its contestants find long-lasting love. Just take a look at the stats:

 

The Bachelor & Bachelorette:

  • Season 17: Sean Lowe and Catherine Guidici — STILL TOGETHER
  • Season 18: Juan Pablo Galavis and Nikki Ferrell — STILL TOGETHER
  • Season 1: Trista Rehn and Ryan Sutter — STILL TOGETHER
  • Season 7: Ashley Hebert and J.P. Rosenbaum — STILL TOGETHER
  • Season 9: Desiree Hartsock and Chris Siegfried — STILL TOGETHER

Despite these numerous success stories, there have been one or two break-ups:

  • Season 1: Alex Michel and Amanda Marsh — BROKE UP
  • Season 2: Aaron Buerge and Helene Eksterowicz — BROKE UP
  • Season 3: Andrew Firestone and Jen Schefft — BROKE UP
  • Season 4: Bob Guiney and Estella Gardinier — BROKE UP
  • Season 5: Jesse Palmer and Jessica Bowlin — BROKE UP
  • Season 6: Byron Velvick and Mary Delgado — BROKE UP
  • Season 7: Charlie O’Connell and Sarah Brice — BROKE UP
  • Season 8: Travis Lane Stork and Sarah Stone — BROKE UP
  • Season 9: Prince Lorenzo Borghese and Jennifer Wilson — BROKE UP
  • Season 10: Andy Baldwin and Tessa Horst — BROKE UP
  • Season 12: Matt Grant and Shayne Lamas — BROKE UP
  • Season 14: Jake Pavelka and Vienna Girardi — BROKE UP
  • Season 15: Brad Womack and Emily Maynard — BROKE UP
  • Season 16: Ben Flajnik and Courtney Robertson — BROKE UP
  • Season 2: Meredith Phillips and Ian McKee — BROKE UP
  • Season 3: Jen Schefft and Jerry Ferris — BROKE UP
  • Season 4: DeAnna Pappas and Jesse Csincsak — BROKE UP
  • Season 5: Jillian Harris and Ed Swiderski — BROKE UP
  • Season 6: Ali Fedotowsky and Roberto Martinez — BROKE UP
  • Season 8: Emily Maynard and Jef Holm — BROKE UP

As you can see, there is certainly a science to finding love and ABC nailed it. Do you want this kind of everlasting love without the hassle of applying for and hoping that you’ll make it on next seasons show? Don’t worry, Daily Potato News has you covered. Our sources spent approximately 3 minutes and 30 seconds studying the show in order to provide you with the following helpful tips. The following dating tips are based on the structure of the show and if followed, will give you “The Bachelor/Bachelorette” experience that you’ve always wanted:

  1. First, find 20-25 highly attractive men/women and bring them all into a single room. Let them all know that you are a bit of a narcissist and that for now on they will all be fighting for your love
  2. Given that it will likely take a while to weed out all of the crazies and find your soul mate, request that all the girls/guys take a several month leave from work so they can fully devote their time to helping you find love
  3. Go on large group dates and make-out with each girl/guy in front of the others; whoever gets the maddest likes you the most. If you really want to spice things up give each of them knives
  4. Make people cry. Love isn’t real unless people start crying
  5. Two on one dates are perfect. Take two of your top girls/guys out on the same date and politely ask one to leave when you realize you like the other one more
  6. When you are down to your top three people, have sexual intercourse with all of them (preferably on different nights). This will demonstrate that you are serious about the dating process. This can also be done the first night with all 20-25 people
  7. When you have finally kicked out all but two girls/guys, let each of them know that you might propose to one of them. Let them sleep on it so they can process how amazing their life will be should you choose them. The next day, only show up and propose to the girl/guy you feel is the right one. Let the other wait long enough to realize that you do not want to be with them; you wouldn’t want to show up and waste any more of their time than you already have

Lastly, if you plan to apply for The Bachelor/Bachelorette we recommend the three following tips:

  1. Be white
  2. Be caucasian
  3. Do not be a minority

Should you follow these three simple rules your chances for making it on the show exponentially increase. In fact, ABC was sued for diversity issues (click on the following article for more: Bachelor and Bachelorette Sued for Alleged Racial Discrimination.”

1

 

ABC did respond, however, and should be given some credit. They introduced Juan Pablo Galavis, a Hispanic male who is probably as close as you can get to being “white” when you are choosing among the various minorities.

 

 

 

 

Image 1 attribution:
ZayZay.com” This image was not altered.

Image 2 attribution:
EonlineThis image was not altered.

Sources:
How many Bachelor and Bachelorette couples actually make it?”
Wetpaint.com.
Bachelor and Bachelorette sued for alleged racial discriminationZayZay.com.

 



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2 replies

  1. That was a riot! LMAO. I absolutely avoid that show and others like it like the plague. I mean, what a ridiculous waste of good t.v. time! Ummm, this is what happens when the soap operas go extinct and get cancelled. WHO honestly THINKS FOR ONE SECOND, that this is the way to go about finding a spouse? Or love? I cannot understand why anyone would want to humiliate themselves in this way. What?! You crave being treated like an object? Enjoy the competitive atmosphere amongst others who also enjoy having self-esteem reduced to ashes, losing to head game players, and sleeping with a sleezebag who IS INDEED ‘test-driving’ ALL of the models, and after debasing yourself, crave the embarrassment of being dumped on INTERNATIONALLY broadcast television? Sado-masochists, or similar would describe people who enjoy punishment like this. See a shrink. Soon.

    Apparently there are folks who probably NEED to be a contestant. Perhaps they really think “they’re all THAT” and full of self-importance and ego…this then, may be good for them…to get knocked down a peg or three. Other than that I have no idea what the attraction could be here…as a contestant or a viewer.

    This is not the way to go about getting famous. This is the notoriety of the least type. Maybe they pay the people really good. I don’t know or care.

    Is it really any wonder so many of these things ended badly? Expectations of love here? Fantasy land, that’s where you’re from? Okay. It’s about as logical as any other idea ‘trending.’ Good luck.

    Liked by 1 person

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